dearest natalie anne...
first of all you, you are my very best friend. 10 years this june. i feel like i've known you my entire life. you are my other half. when you hurt, i hurt, when you're mad, i'm mad, when you're happy, i'm happy :) and y'all ready know that when YOU laugh, i can't refrain from laughter...it's utterly contagious. --the trouble we have gotten in because of that one........p r i c e l e s s.
remember five or so years ago when we promised each other that we would NEVER let any boy come between us? and that we would be best friends forever? that when we got married, we would live right next to each other and still see each other every day? well, i can't promise you that we will live next to each other in matching anthropology houses, or even in the same state, and that we will see each other every day, and i can't promise that a boy won't come between us, because it's happened before and i can guarantee it will again..but you know what? i CAN promise you that i will be there every time that boy makes you cry and breaks your heart, and i can promise that NO MATTER WHAT, we will a l w a y s be best friends as long as you allow me to be.
alright, now down to the truth......i'll admit now and forever that i envy you. BIG TIME. sin or not, i wish i were you sometimes! you are absolutely B E A U T I F U L and any girl who says differently, is clearly jealous. you are seriously one of the most amazing, strong girls i have EVER met. sure, a lot has happened and you're not perfect, don't you ever let those imperfections bring you down. those imperfections are what make you, you. any guy would be lucky to have you, he would be getting the complete package. a kind, sweet, loving, good, CLEAN, girl. you deserve the best. and you will find it! i promise you. you will be blessed for being the kind of girl you are. be patient.
let go of the things that are holding you back.
BE YOU. and do not let ANYONE change you, for any reason.
"You can't just cling on to something because it's familiar."
it'll be hard, and you might feel like you will regret it....but 10 years from now when you look back, you will thank yourself for being brave enough to let go of something that you didn't need and only held on to because of the two years that were familiar to you.
lastly.......you'll feel alone. you'll hate him. you'll hate yourself. and he will try to convince you that he hates you and 'never loved you'... well good riddance...you don't need that crap anyway. keep your chin up. ps. you most definitely will NOT be alone. you have me. you have your family, and you have the lord. be the strong girl i know you are.
all i can do is laugh when i think about everything we have gone through up until now....how hard we have made each other laugh, how hard we've made each other cry, and how many times we have held each other while we cried over some dumb bastard...ha ha! this May we'll be graduating from high school and i'm sick that we aren't walking together....we should both be walking through that golden 'O' together...but it's okay, cause that night i'll be snuggs down in bed with you and we'll FINALLY be able to call each other 'roommates'. i love you natalie anne tueller. to the moon and back! one of ours. i would do anything for you, and i will ALWAYS be there for you, good decisions or bad. i'll be there to have your back when those girls say things to you out of jealousy..and when those boys that realize you are too good for them say things out of insecurity. always and forever. i promise.
love, your best friend.