Be Still...

in the past month i've realized two things, one that my heart is and will forever lie in Utah and two that no matter where you go in life, it has no meaning if your success, failure, good and bad times aren't spent with the ones you love.

moving to California for seven months was such an eye opener for me. i haven't always had the strongest relationship with my parents, especially my dad. in fact there were times when i absolutely despised him. most of which derived from the "teenage years" {need i say more?} but, being away for that long helped me realize how much impact the people in my life really have on me and how much they really do mean to me. i gained a new sense of respect and love for the people who supported me through all of the good, and especially those that stood by my side and loved me unconditionally through all of the bad.

my mum and i have always had a pretty close relationship. we would talk about everything! {and continue to do so} she was everything to me that her mum wasn't to her. and i always loved that i knew i could go to her for anything. now she was never a friend to me. she was my mum. and she made that very clear. at times i wanted her to look past all of the stupid things i was doing and not worry, and to just say, just don't do it again. that was never the case. i was grounded, my car was taken away, taken off the phone plan, and we both had our fair share of tears.. but i am forever grateful for it. in the long run, that relationship was the very one that set me straight. it made me realize that yes, we all make mistakes and we are all imperfect, but that was never a free bee to continue making those same mistakes over and over again. she was the one who taught me that there is a consequence for every action i ever made in this life, whether great or small. and i am so grateful to her for that because it has made me a better person.

for once in my life i actually THINK before i act or speak. i am able to think of the consequences in my head before I act and ask myself, is it worth it? THIS IS HUGE FOR ME GUYS! if any of you know me personally or well at all, you will know that this is a down right MIRACLE.

i know that CA isn't entirely responsible for this change in me. but i know that in the time away from home and loved ones, i was forced to learn and respect people not as my "mothers daughter" but as Demitria Jeannette Kee. i had to learn exactly who Demi is and what kind of person i want to become one day, i had to make those little changes on my own. i had to want it more than anyone else wanted it for myself, and most importantly i had to humble myself in order to pray to God to mold me into the person that HE wants me to someday be.

i feel so grateful for the opportunities and new faces put in my life to force me to become a better me. God puts people in your life for a specific reason and he sends you down paths you would have never thought were possible, but at this point i've learned it's best to just sit back and enjoy the journey and learn all that i can from every situation and every new person i meet.

stay true to myself and be in tune enough to know which direction God would have me go.

so i'll move back home to Utah and have a better attitude towards the people who all along have just wanted the very best for me, i'll love the people in my life like CRAZY and i will continue to learn and grow as i mold into the person that God would have me be.